Happy New Years Eve! I have been holding this post in Queue for a few weeks and it just wasn’t the right time to post it or something came up and it was pushed to the wayside. Since it’s the last day of 2016 and I had an amazing year, I made the decision a few months ago to release the Divorce Syndrome Spirit and demand my DELIVERANCE! I rarely share personal business on my blog to this extent. I pray that this post will help someone who have dealt with a situation similar to mine or anyone who finds themselves spiraling down this path.
It’s no secret that I have been married and of course divorced. In fact I may be one of few divorced women that will openly say that they generally loved being married. Hey I did! In fact it wasn’t until this year that I was able to fully let go of the hurt that I experienced and told God that I was ready to open my heart to love again. You see for the past five years I was that women that said “I don’t care if I’m alone” or “I love being single”. Can I just say that’s not true. The realization is that God did not intend for man to be alone. Hence that’s why in Genesis 2:18 (KJV) states “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him”. So if I be a child of God that means that his intention for my life was not to be alone, RIGHT?
Let’s take a brief walk back in time. Once upon a time there was a wife who desperately wanted her marriage to work so she turned to the only place she knew she could….To God. She made a decision to get herself together, get saved and at the moment that she confessed her life to Christ she was instantly blessed with the holy ghost. Sounds great right? But here’s the problem she didn’t understand the meaning of unequally yoked. 2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV) states “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” You see if there’s one thing that I have learned and that’s you simply can’t select your husband (Ladies I’m talking to you). What is ordained by God will be and that’s why in Proverbs 18:22 (KJV) it states “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD”.
So here I was in a marriage that I assumed I was doing everything right and praying that we would big happy family. WRONG! I learned valuable lessons from my marriage and I learned even more as a divorced woman with kids. It’s fair to say that you never really know yourself or someone else if you never really got to understand their character and peek inside to see if they value their integrity. Trust me #LessonsLearned!
This left me to make a decision that I no longer wanted to date or even remotely open my heart to loving in any capacity. You see the Divorce Syndrome lead me to consume myself with building my career, raising my family and totally focusing on my kids. I went on like this for years. Yes years! Needless to say that you can only go on like this for so long. Actually I probably would have allowed myself to continue living with Divorce Syndrome Spirit but by the grace of God I finally let go of all old hurts, prayed and God Delivered me.
>>Fast Forward to 2016. One day I woke up and decided that I wanted to court again. However this time will be very different. How you ask? Here’s where my journey to discovering myself and learn very valuable lessons that I needed to change.
I happen to get up one Sunday morning and decided to attend one of three churches but truthfully when I passed one church I heard the Lord say “Not that one”. So I passed that particular one and decided that it would be one of the other two. After much deliberation I decided to visit Bishop Paul Morton’s church where on this particular Sunday, Pastor Terrance Johnson was bringing forth the Word of God and my it was a powerful word on marriage. (This is why is important to have an ear to hear from God). After church both Pastor Terrence & First Lady Torsha Johnson were out in the lobby speaking with saints as they sold their book, The Answer which just so happens to be an open book that navigates singles into healthy relationships and assist couples in nurturing marriages that last. Of course I purchased a book because over the past six months I have been praying to God to release any hurt that still remained and open my heart to love again.
Once I opened the book I was hooked. This is not like any other inspirational/ relationship book. Pastor Terrence & First Lady Torsha Johnson wrote this book raw & uncut (not worldly) but they tell their truth from their beginning to now in oneness. I can appreciate the way they tell their story of things they did incorrectly and how with patience, the love & support of their family, church and God they are now amazing examples of living saved and nurturing their marriage daily. If I can be honest I never gave much attention to relationship inspirational books when I was married. I had my fair share of inspirational books but never gave the relationship ones much thought. After reading Pastor Terrance & First Lady Torsha Johnson’s The Answer book I realized that I handled situations, my reactions and attitude were 20-25% at fault in my previous marriage. Hey you live and learn! That’s why I’m sharing my truth with you today.
The moment that I purchased The Answer I was anxious to dig in and get started. What I found was that I couldn’t really concentrate while at home in between working and taking care of the kids so one day while I was headed to the gym I decided to grab my book and read it at the beginning of my workout when I hit the treadmill for my daily 2-3 mile run. I know what your thinking…most folks need trap music to workout right? I’m totally the opposite. I actually listen to gospel. My treadmill time is when I tune out everything except for praying and speaking to God. Once I put on my headphones, gospel music then I was able to fully give The Answer my attention. (Keep in mind you have to be a great multi-tasking). I found over the next few days I found myself craving my daily exercise routine with God and The Answer. Trust me I had so many revelations on the treadmill and I thank God everyday for anointing Pastor Terrance & First Lady Torsha Johnson with the gift to elegantly write a book on “Real Life Relationship Issues” and how together with God you can both work through the issues at hand for the BIGGER PICTURE….BEING ONE! I highly encourage you to join their ANSWER MOVEMENT.
~Turkesha